Your relationship with money

When we think of relationships, we often think of our interactions with other people. Life experiences teach us that relationships with people can be positive or challenging, healthy or unhealthy, for many different reasons. But have you ever considered what your relationship with money is like?


So why is having a good relationship with money important? Financial wellness is an important part of our overall wellbeing. Financial wellness includes having a healthy relationship with money that makes us feel satisfied and not overly stressed out.


So how is our relationship with money formed? It’s formed by our observations and the messaging we see and hear related to money. Our early experiences with money, such as witnessing arguments about it or seeing a huge amount of importance placed on it, can trigger a range of emotions such as anxiety, resentment or feelings of elitism that we carry through life. Those experiences and emotions shape our values and relationship with money.


If you haven’t done so, take time to think about your relationship with money and how it was formed. Key questions you could ask yourself include:

  • Where do my money values come from?

  • Where did I learn my money skills e.g at school, from family, or through trial and error?

  • What is the first thing that comes to mind when I hear the word ‘money’

  • What do I do really well when it comes to money?

  • What does financial wellbeing mean to me?

  • How does thinking about money make me feel?

Asking yourself these questions can help you establish what your relationship with money is. No matter what the answer is, there are ways that we can make money positively work for us. This can decrease our stress, increase our confidence and let us put our energy into the things that really matter!


If you need immediate financial help and you’re in New Zealand, you can call the free financial helpline Moneytalks on 0800 345 123 or text 4029. Moneytalks connects people and whānau with their local foodbanks, helps them find their way through Work and Income processes and entitlements and supports people to manage their money.